Kismet for the 21st century
by IceCreamSundae
Summary: Post Season 4 but Pre-Season 5. Larry's left, Ally's heartbroken and their friends are determined to sort it out. First ficcie, please be nice. Review my story if you believe in fairies!
1. Renée gives fate a helping hand

"Dear Larry, I miss you. There, I've admitted it. I can't help it. Why? Why did you leave? Why didn't I go with you?"  
  
Renée walked into Ally's bedroom, brandishing a crumpled piece of paper.  
  
"Ally, we need to talk. You've been writing letters to him again and I can't let you keep doing this to yourself. He hurt you. He hurt you bad, but I will not let you throw your life away over him. I've set you up an account on an internet dating website; I haven't put out a personal for you. That is up to you. You need to do this."  
  
Ally opened and shut her mouth several times, as if none of the words she knew could convey how she was feeling. Silently, she walked over to the computer and looked at the screen. Seeing her online moniker, she turned to Renée and said "NeurosesChick? Is that the best you can do? Oh, well." Looking back at the screen, she ran her fingers over the keyboard and started typing:  
  
"Hi, I'm a 31 year old woman. I need a guy as a friend who I can talk to, as I haven't got over my ex-boyfriend yet. All enquiries and jokes to AskMyTherapist@aol.com"  
  
Satisfied that the email did her justice, she clicked on the send button. Leaning back in her seat, she put her head in her hands, emitted a guttural moan and muttered sotto voce "Oh, God! What have I done?"  
  
Occurring over in Detroit...  
  
"Sam, please! Can't you wait for your mother outside?" Larry was growing increasingly impatient, drumming a tattoo on the computer desk. Outside, a car horn sounded. Larry sighed, half with annoyance, half with relief as he kissed Sam on the cheek and reminded him to behave. He looked at the phone, dialled the area code for Boston and punched in half of Ally's phone number before hanging up. He was disgusted with himself. He could represent mass murderers in court, but he couldn't make the call he had been trying to make for the last six months.  
  
He signed on to AOL, greeted by a cheery "You've Got Spam", which included three porno emails, two life insurance policies and one virus. All of these had the obligatory miss-spelt headers. He opened his favourites and logged into the one website that Sam had convinced him to join. He was "HotFudgeSundae", an allusion to when Ally had dumped candied toppings on him when he was having lunch with Helena. Nobody had emailed him, save two men who thought he was looking for a relationship. He decided to edit his profile to read:  
  
"Lonely guy, 31, seeks anyone for friendship. My son has driven me to this, saying that I need to stop mourning the loss of an old girlfriend. All jibes and mockery to HotFudgeSundae@aol.com"  
  
Meanwhile, in Massachusetts...  
  
Ally was pacing nervously, staring at the monitor as though it might bite her. Renée came in and softly asked Ally what was wrong. "There's this guy online and ... I think ... I think I might like him!" Renée looked at Ally with her head on one side, and said, "Ally, you can either email this guy to find out what's what, or you can draw another picture of your wedding dress".  
  
Slowly, Ally lowered her shaking fingers to the keyboard and began to type. 


	2. Richard messes with destiny again

Ally walked into Renée's bedroom, asking her if the internet was working. "Yes, Ally, I think it is, why?" "He hasn't got back to me. HotFudgeSundae, he... he hasn't got back to me and, and... Oh, that's the least of it!" "Ally, what's wrong?" "Richard told me that I have to go to Detroit for a case! I hate Detroit, it ruined my life!" "Who's second chairing?" "The Biscuit, but still ... I don't want to have to go to Detroit!" Ally plodded over to the freezer and removed a tub of "Phish Food", grabbed a table spoon and started eating. She was mumbling incoherently about John being happy and about everyone deserting her. "Ally, what was that?" "John has a new girlfriend, he met her online and they've been IMing each other. John was the one person I could trust to be depressed with me and now even he's happy, it's just not fair." "Ally, that is so selfish." "Fine, but it's still not fair!"  
  
Ally walked into her room with the tub of ice-cream. Renée followed, asking, "Who is this online vixen of John's?" "Some women called MorganIce, she's a lawyer, I don't know anything else, but she seems to love John, which is all that really matters, I suppose." Ally yawned, told Renée she was going to bed, kissed her roommate on the cheek and put the ice-cream in the freezer.  
  
Ally woke up the next morning, determined to set Richard straight, swearing she would not have to try this case. She walked into the office with a determined attitude and a grimace on her face. She strode past Elaine, who was modelling her latest invention, which consisted of two hands, which were massaging her temples, and into Richard's office.  
  
"Richard, I am not going to try this case, I refuse to do it and you have plenty of decent lawyers in this firm and I don't even know who opposing counsel is and... and why do I have to go to Detroit?" "In answer to your run-on sentence, you are the best lawyer for the case, opposing counsel is Jamie Paul and you have to go to Detroit for the piles of money." Ally looked at him with her jaw slack. Did he say ... Jamie ... Paul?  
  
"Jamie Paul? Richard, are you sure?" "Uh-huh, yeah, Jamie Paul née Fisher, she's a good lawyer, but I think we can beat her, Ally". Ally ran out of the office into the Unisex, took the remote from her jacket pocket and opened John's hole. She found him typing on his laptop. He looked up, surprised at the interruption, saw the tears streaming down her face and shut down the laptop. "Ally, what's wrong?" "John, I have to try our case against Larry's ex-girlfriend. I have to go to Detroit, which is bad enough, and I have to face the woman who is in part to blame for me losing Larry." "Ally, take the rest of the day off, go home to Renée and talk to her about this. If you take this case, you will come out of it stronger, I promise you."  
  
Ally walked home in the rain, realising that she had to face Larry at some point. "I just didn't want it to be so soon", she muttered to herself.  
  
She opened the door to the apartment and rang Renée, leaving a message on her work answer phone. She logged onto AOL and checked her email. There, in her mailbox, was a message from HotFudgeSundae... 


	3. You are the lead balloon upon my wings

A/N: Thanks to PlasmicFemale for the review (hint hint) and help on the storyline. New chappie up soon! Promise! ********************************************************************* "Dear NeurosesChick, Sorry to hear about your moping. I feel sorry for myself as well. We're probably a match made in hell, but I am finding myself stooping below the lowest common denominator. Here's my cell- 079403 50522, Amiably Yours, HotFudgeSundae"  
  
Ally added the number to her phonebook, knowing she would never use it and turned her attention back to the screen. She saw that she had another email  
  
"ATTN: ALLY! From:TheLittleBiscuit@AOL.COM Ally, Richard will not budge; you have to take this case. I will be picking you up tomorrow from your apartment at 6 am. I have something to tell you that will make this worth your while."  
  
Ally could feel her grasp on reality slipping away, but she knew that she had to keep it together. Hearing some distant music, she turned her head to see her nemesis- the dancing baby. He was wearing a cupid outfit and breaking all of the arrows over his knee. Ally groaned and snapped "Look, currently YOU are the least of my worries now just... GO!" Renée stood in the doorway with a bewildered look on her face. By way of explanation, Ally pointed to where the dancing baby had been and sighed. "He was ... He was ..." Ally broke down into tears as Renée gently rocked her in her arms. Ally snivelled and sniffed her way through an explanation, turned to her roommate and simply stated, "I have to go and prepare my case, then get ready to try a case ... in Detroit ... against ... Jamie." She spat the word Jamie out as though it was a dirty word.  
  
"Why am I up already? 6 am is an ungodly hour. I really can't believe that Richard is doing this to me. It's just not right. I mean, sure he has the emotional intelligence of an educationally subnormal cockroach, but even he knew how much I hurt after Larry left me. I am talking far too fast, but that is probably 17 cups of coffee's worth of caffeine surging through my blood trying its damnedest to keep me awake. The disturbing thing is that I am talking this fast when nobody is here to hear it."  
  
John, prompt as ever, rang the doorbell at 6 am sharp. Ally was pacing and panicking at the same time. "It's open!" she shouted from within a paper bag she was using to stop her hyperventilating. John came in to find her bent double over her suitcase, panting and wheezing, and looking a mess. When her wheezing had subsided, Ally looked into the mirror. Deciding that she had her pride, even if Larry had her heart, she pulled herself together.  
  
At the departure lounge, Ally made a concentrated effort to pay attention to someone else in the world. "So, John ... what was it you had to tell me?" Between slurps of (decaf) coffee, she listened and her eyes grew wider and wider. "You're telling me that MorganIce is ... is ..."  
  
"Nelle, yes, Ally. I should have seen the clues a long time ago. However, I didn't and I have fallen back in love with her, that is, if I ever fell out of love with her. I don't think I truly did. If someone means so much to you that you hurt physically when they aren't near, even after you have stopped seeing them ... then, they have become such a profound part of your life that you won't stop being part of your life, perhaps ever. I still care for you, I still care for Melanie, and I think that I more than care for Nelle."  
  
"But, John, you said she was a snob and a bully and she was so cold to you after you stopped seeing each other. How can you take that risk?"  
  
"I think her emotional safety mechanism is becoming so cold that no-one can get close to her, so she can't feel spurned. You saw how hurt she was when her doctor was sent to prison. No ... I think that Nelle is much more complex than we would figure out or than she would ever dare let on. I don't think it is fair for me to judge on a long past break-up."  
  
"Does she know about who you are?"  
  
*BING-BONG* *This is the last call for flight 8675309 to Detroit, Michigan. Would all passengers please make their way to Gate J*  
  
Ally clung to John, knowing that if anyone could help her through this it would be Larry...John, John! For God's sake, a year later and he was still haunting her subconscious. She decided that even if she couldn't contact Larry, she could at least make use of her WAP phone before she got on the plane. She sent a brief email to HotFudgeSundae, detailing her case and her vague whereabouts, in case he became a mad stalker. She ended the email by saying that she had her laptop with her and would be open to an IM later in the week. With that, she switched off her phone and boarded the plane. 


	4. Anvils keep falling on my head

"Ally, there are not enough peanuts in that bag to sustain a small puppy, let alone a thirty-mumble year old woman. Stop trying to rip the foil with your teeth, put the bag down, and relax. It's not even a transatlantic flight, and you've made plenty of those." "I don't care. I am nervous. I am very nervous. Either I play with the peanut bag or I play with my hair. And if you want me to face the client with greasy hair then I will, I will, I... will, John. Oh, God, I'm a mess. It's just a flight, it's just a city, and it's just... my ex's ex that I'm facing in court..." "Ally, I refuse to let you make this into such a big deal. Just calm down, try to get some sleep and I'll wake you up when the food is coming." "Just, fill me in on some of the case facts first will you?" "Well, if you want me to, fine. We are representing an Ms Lois Kane; she is suing her company for emotional distress and unfair dismissal. Her employment was terminated after it was found out that she was courting a man who worked for a company that was in direct competition with hers. She is saying the damage is irreparable; she's looking for $200 K. And before you ask, Jamie is second chairing." "Two-hundred thousand for Unfair Dismissal ... John, that's insane, we'll never get that much." "I know, I told her on the phone. She said that she doesn't mind, as long as she can spook them." "Okay, John, we can do this, right? If I know that, I can sleep. If I can sleep, I can't play with the peanut bag." "Yes, Ally, we can do this." "Right, thank you." Ally plonked her head down on the hard, airplane pillow, curled into the foetal position and tried to get some sleep.  
  
"Ally, Ally? Hey, food's up. Do you want to catch the in-flight movie? It's Only You. It's frothy and should take your mind off the case." Ally stirred groggily and knocked her glass of water flying. Shrugging, she sat up straight and she tried to remember where she was and what she was doing there. She remembered where she was but failed to see why she was there. Surely, John could win this one on his own. Why was it imperative that she came along? She plugged her earphones into the jack on the side of her armrest, but couldn't concentrate on the movie. The guy on screen reminded her vividly of Larry. Deciding that that film would concentrate her mind on the case and He who must not be thought of, she tried reading her Jackie Collins. She wondered why it didn't make sense until she realised that the book was upside down. "Okay, I'm nervous." She admitted to herself.  
  
Several hours later, a dishevelled Ally McBeal and a John Cage at the end of his tether entered the hotel lobby. John picked up their keys and told Ally to meet him in the dining room at 7:30 tomorrow morning. Ally agreed and called the elevator. Pressing the button for the 13th floor (keeping her triskaidekaphobia under control), she shifted her laptop from one had to the other. As soon as the elevator reached the top floor, she zipped out of the doors to her room. It was a medium sized room, complete with kettle and mediocre satellite television. She plugged her laptop into the mains and started to charge her cellphone. She decided that one way to calm down would be to have a nice hot bath. She managed to turn on the inevitably stiff hotel bath taps and poured in some hotel-brand bubble bath. She figured that if Samantha in Sex and the City could relax in hotel bath, then she had to be able to relax in one as well. Wondering why the hotel bubble bath smelt exactly the same as the hotel shampoo, she eased herself into the bath. Feeling the inevitable scalding sensation that always occurs when you get into a hot bath, and then the inevitable feeling of cold when she was fully in, she let out a long sigh of contentment, or as contented as she could get at the moment. Her shoulders dropped about a foot and the bags under her eyes melted away. She soaked in the bath until she became more wrinkled than a raisin.  
  
Wrapping two disproportionately small hotel towels around her tiny frame, she wandered over to her laptop. There was no harm in checking to see which of her buddies were online, she reasoned. Nellan was there, as was Naomi, but there was no sign of HotFudge. She was about to sign off when an instant pop-up...popped up. ""ChoppedNutsandWhippedCream" wants to talk to you. Do you accept? Y/N?" Ally was about to click no when she realized that this was probably a reference to some sort of pudding, say a hot fudge sundae, she accepted. "Dear HFS, I really need to talk to you..." ********************************************************************* A/N: Okay, that's it for this chapter. Just to let you know, the next chapter will mainly be a chat *tips hat to Plasmic*, but not fully *FF-Net rules*. I will probably have it up by this time next week! Goody! 


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